Israel, Hamas, and general idiocy.

One has to be pretty cautious with one's Jewish friends, these days, though a good number of them are beginning to wonder whether Israel hasn't gone too far in the war against Palestine. It's a sad business. I supported the establishment of the state of Israel, though a little leary of the act if terrorism with which they started out; but I have to say that during the past decade or so I have become less and less sympathetic to the state, what with its continually illegal building of Jewish houses on what by any account is Palestinian land; and now they are clearly going to bomb their 'enemies' into submission, however many children and woman and indeed innocent men are killed in the process. It would really be good if a new leader emerged to take the place of the present bomb-happy loon, but it seems that a sufficient number of Israelis support his actions to keep him in place.
The above is not intended to support the bombing of Israel by Hamas, which clearly the action of terrorists. However, if one compares the number of women and children and even soldiers killed by Hamas rockets with the number of  children killed by Israeli bombs, it is clear that the term 'aggressor' does not apply only to Hamas. And as for the children killed while playing on the Palestinian beach and in the Palestinian school, who Israel claim were killed by fault Hamas rockets - phooey. That story has been told too often to be credible.

Life is too short to temper chocolate

O.K., the decision has been made. After great consideration I am embarking on a campaign to return cooking to the early 1950s, when after the shortages of the war everyone was delighted that Butter, cream, good meat and wines were again available - and when especially from France came the finest and best period of cooking, reigned over by the sainted Elizabeth David. Back, even, to the great days of Alexandre Dumas. Away with these tiny meals on enormous plates - vegetables disguised as twigs and pieces of string and cooked for microseconds, everyone terrified at the idea of a small spoonful of cream. Back to the good old days of rich food drenched in cream and brandy, potatoes cooked in half-pounds of butter, plates overflowing with food dripping with rich sauces. Join me - to hell with nouveau cuisine and long long lists of things on packets which are allegedly bad for you. Onward and upward to the very heights of deliciousness; drink cabbage water if you must, revel in the delights of undercooked brussels sprouts. Life is too short to temper chocolate.

The porn's just not exciting enough

Do anonymous ladies and gentlemen telephone you from time to time to warn you that your computer is dangerously faulty, and you should hand it over to them immediately and pay a large fee to have them repair it? Here's a way to get rid of them: I simply ask, 'Oh, are you the people who provide my porn channel? I've been wanting to contact you.' There's a stunned silence; before they can start again, you go on: 'Really the porn has been getting very mild lately - there's more exciting porn in The Daily Telegraph. Could you please send me some stronger stuff?' The noise of someone having some kind of nervous attack is heard. 'Maybe', you say, 'you need to see what you've been sending me recently. If you give me your email address I'll send you a copy of The Bishop Meets Miss Whip . . .'
There is a click from the other end as the receiver is hurriedly replaced.
Honestly - it works.

Kindly speak clearly . . .

I do wish that computer help-lines would employ men and women who speak clear English. I really haven't a racist bone in my body, and I have liked and enjoyed meeting every Indian I have ever encountered, but oh, I am very tired indeed of trying to understand the Indian voices which always seem to answer when I attempt to consult the help-lines. What with indifferent telephone lines to wherever in Indian the office happens to be, a slight hearing problem and the often extremely heavy accents, I have just given up trying to understand them and either live with the problem or search around until I find some in the neighbourhood who can help. I understand that the problem arises for financial reasons, but if the computer companies realized just how much they are frustrating so many customers, they might think again.
End of rant!

What Mr Lilly Thinaks of Cancerians

Qualities of the Sign Cancer   Is the onely house of the Moon, and is the first Sign of the Watry or Northern Triplicity, is Watry, Cold, Moyst, Flegmatick, Feminine, Nocturnal, Moveable, a Solstice Signe, mute and slow of Voyce, Fruitful, Northerne.

Diseases   It signifies Imperfections all over, or in the Brest, Stomack and Paps, weak Digesnion, cold Stomack, Ptifick, salt Flegms, roten Coughs, dropsicall Humours, Impostumations in the Stomach.

Places Cancer signifieth   The sea, great Rivers, Navigable Waters; but in the Inland Countries it notes places neer Rivers, Brooks Springs, Wels, Cellars in Houses, Wash-houses, Marsh grounds, Ditches with Rushes, Sedges, Sea banks, Trenches, Cisternes.

Shape and Description   Gene4rally a low and smal stature, the upper parts of more bignesse then the lower, a round Visage; sickly, pale, a whitely Complexion, the Haire a sad browne, little Eyes, prone to have many Children, if a Woman.

Kingdoms, Countries and Cities subject to Cancer   Scotland, Zealand, Holland, Prussia, Algier, Constantinople, Venice, Millan, Genoa, Amsterdam, Yorke, Magdeburg, Wittenburg, Saint-Lucas, Cadiz.

-          William Lilly, Christian Astrology (1647)

Sunflowers

Hello!   Like everybody I am shattered by the shooting down of an innocent passenger plane in what can only be called an act of war; everyone will have their own responses to it.   What hit me very forcibly was the shot on TV of searchers looking for bodies in that beautiful field of Sunflowers.   To me it was reminiscent of the association of poppy fields with the dead of the First World War.   Then parents of one of the Australian casualties remarked, 'Our son died in the sky -  and we look up,  thinking of him still up there!'    Surely this is the  best kind of spiritual and positive way to begin to come to terms with their dreadful loss.
Love, Julia

So You Think They Can Dance - II

Well, yes, alright - they can. This week's programme - the first with the top 20 - had some dazzling routines, including one which the judges quite properly said was one of the best in the who  series of these programmes. So I apologise! Great stuff - as long as the American public don't or didn't vote out the best dancers just because the others were prettier. However, on the present evidence, they all deserve to succeed.